Idk what's better between being totally asocial (and interacting with no one) and… socializing but being afraid of everything and everyone because you don't want the little chance you got to be a failure

(Indeed by "socializing" I'm not speaking of Mastodon. Lel)

unsolicited advice 

@SirFhinger Depends on if you're introverted or extroverted, and even then you shouldn't be afraid. Y'know?

unsolicited advice 

@artemis In fact I'm completely, utterly, profoundly, whateverendsby "y" introverted. I know I shouldn't be afraid but life has offered me too many example of legit reasons to being afraid. And now I don't want to be a part of a community/social circle, do a lot of mental & emotional investment to finally feel excluded of this group because I don't act like average person or idk what other reason

That fucking hurt y'know?

re: unsolicited advice 

@SirFhinger We're introverted too and agree. We shouldn't /have/ to be afraid but we have been anyways, and haven't really had any IRL friends for over a decade.

What helped us was not worrying about being part of a circle, and just being friends with friends who care about us.

However, this was really only possible in online contexts, especially with Mastodon. IRL, we were too concerned with how others saw us to really be able to be ourselves.

We just remind ourselves that online friends are just as valid as offline friends, and we don't need anyone else to tell us how to be happy.

re: unsolicited advice 

@artemis I really don't want to be exaggeratedly dramatical but.. By "community/social circle" I wasn't meaning of any IRL friends. I don't have any IRL friends. But I was speaking about having (and keeping) "at least" online friends.

Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for you that today you have found love and bounds thanks to Mastodon & others, but I don't think we're really speaking about the same thing

re: unsolicited advice 

@SirFhinger Totally fair, we're a bit "intoxicated" right now and might be missing your point

Our point is that we stopped worrying about what anyone IRL thought about us, and focused more on the opinions of those we consider friends in an online context.

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