Both sexes can fuck a pringles can, but neither can do it very well.

When you hit a certain age you become permanently unimpressed by alot of shit

Noticed that Ford was asking Facebook users how they used their Superduty F350 trucks. So I replied: Like most owners of large trucks I enjoy tailgating people in smaller cars, blowing diesel smoke through crowded intersections, and generally making parking difficult for other normal car and truck owners at supermarkets and other suburban outlet malls near where I live.

Is this how it was intended?
The sunrise over smoke stacks in the Midwest,
the beauty of this abandoned factory.
Christmas lights blinking on and off all out of time in what used to be
your pink house dreams of a middle class America.

As the human race evolves, matures and gains more knowledge of the workings of the universe, it is only natural for it to also abandon super natural beliefs and superstition. Get on board and help write the future or disappear into the footnotes of history. The choice is yours.

Christmas lights and Jeff Epstein have something in common- they don't hang themselves.

Sub-creatures! Gozer the Gozerian, Gozer the Destructor, Volguus Zildrohar, the Traveller has come! Choose and perish!

Jazz music always makes me think of Charlie Brown and shit, I mean, like those Halloween and Christmas specials. There's Charlie looking all fucking depressed and shit, and Linus dragging around his blanket and that stupid fucking dog thinks he's a pilot or something.

I love the ocean, its just like the aquariums at Wal Mart, only the fish are alive.

This is no job for the police. Only a ninja can stop a ninja.

Your momma so ugly even the abyss wouldn't stare into her.

I've decided to kill off a few of the characters in the book I'm writing. I think it'll spice up my autobiography.

Once the final drops of ranch are mined out of the ground, I fully expect the U.S. economy to completely collapse.

About 41 years ago two people had sex and now I have to go to work every day.

The version of me you created in your mind is not my responsibility.

Woah, oat milk. This isn't the time to talk about our relationship.

Capitalism: Communism would mean the death of ownership! Say goodbye to having any personal goods of your very own.

Also Capitalism: Sure, you have a right to what you own, but we never actually *sold* you a product, we merely provided a service/product on loan for which your payment has currently run out. *said about literally everything*

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