Pinned toot

check this out

*crumples a piece of paper in his hands*

Ta-da! Origami garbage!

Pinned toot

Mistrust what I say, for I concern myself not with systematization but with exploration

this is my eldritch abomination, they like spaghetti because it reminds them of the indescribable stretched and compressed hypergeometries of their home dimension

I have a beautiful cap, because I'm a mushroom.

Remetheus :raccoon: boosted

Which part of your body does pizza come from?

Gently increase your awareness to the lasagna.

On a desserted island, there's a lot of ice cream.

Be afraid of raccoons
They'll steal all of your spoons

We are sorry to inform you that you have not been selected for a secret mission.

A wise person always has a vague but interesting statement that is relevant to the situation.

Everything will make sense once you've replaced every redaction with the word 'raccoon'.

more skeletons than my secret soup recipe

dildo self-defense (hypothetical butt-involved scenario) 

when you suddenly get attacked by a screaming knife-wielding maniac while you're naked and have a dildo up your ass, transitioning from being in a full-squat to a lunge, buttcheeks clenched to eject the dildo to your hand and striking forward at a vital point could save your life

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dildo self-defense 

not to get personal but i just suddenly realized that knowing the technique to utilize handheld blunt objects as weapons extends to being able to beat people with dildos

i'm not saying the best approach to combat is with generalized fundamentals and angles of attack, but for general self-defense having access to a wide range of improvised weapons is useful, especially when most of the time you're not in an ideal scenario with an ideal weapon.

The future gets so dark, I need night vision.

mood 

mood swing, mood slide, mood see-saw, mood merry-go-round

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meow.social

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