Friend: “I love doing photography of abandoned spaces! I love that post-apocalyptic look, but they’re so hard to find!”

Me, watching the four horsemen literally riding down upon us: “Well, I have some good news!”

Friend: “And I love post-apocalyptic games! The idea of surviving the end times SO MUCH FUN”

Me, hastily stuffing azithromycin into a backpack: “FUN”

Friend: “I mean, it would be hard, but my life would finally have PURPOSE, you know”

Me frantically memorizing maps of my area: “It’s good to have purpose”

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